I hope someday I will find that kind of love. It’s not romantic kind of love I’m talking about. I’m looking for sisterhood. Don’t get me wrong, I have female friends. Friends that I cherish very much. We hangout often, talk about things and do favors for each another. And that’s pretty much friendship, I suppose. Showing up is the whole point of friendship, don’t you think? So I show up when they need me. I show up when I’m expected. I attend birthdays and never forget to wish them happy birthday. Sometimes I buy presents, actually mostly.
But I haven’t really found my soul sister. I haven’t experienced sisterhood. I’m talking about someone who knows me in and out and I know them that well too. I’m talking about someone who wouldn’t mind going to event horizon(black hole) if that means saving me. And I will love them enough not to let them do such a stupid thing. Someone who got my back and sticks through it all. Someone who listens to all my stupid experiences and bullshit stories and tell me it’s bullshit but listens some more.
I’m looking for the Caroline to my Max, the Ann to My Leslie, the Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda to my Cassie. I’m looking for my soul sister.
I have seen how sisterhood works and it’s all the love we need anyway. It doesn’t matter how hard times are, they stick together. I saw it firsthand from my mother and mentor.(well, I doubt I can ever be half the woman she is). She has this one friend she never gets tired of having around. They have stuck together through it all. The good, the bad, the messy, raising teenagers and everything in between. Sometimes her best friend makes decisions about our lives and she doesn’t even mind asking. It’s like they were made for each other. No doubt. My mom doesn’t have to carry her burdens alone. And someday, I hope I will find that. Who needs more if they can have a real best friend?
It’s the kind of love only a sister from the other mother can provide.
You probably wondering why I wrote this post while I talk so much about my friends in my previous post. Well, I had a soliloquy and it hit me that I really don’t have a real best friend. There’s no one I can call at 2 a.m when I need something, no one I can tell anything that pops in my head. I don’t have my 911 or is it 999? It’s mostly just a bunch of people that I hangout with and sometimes invite wine to the party. Take seflies and post online.
I know I might go through life and never meet my soul sister. I heard my best years to make solid friendships is closing in. I have heard it, you have heard it, the Eskimos have heard it and we all know it’s probably true. But a girl can hope, don’t you think?
Just another rumble.